A clock! A clock! My kingdom for an analog clock!

February, I want you to know, was unpleasant this year.

I mean, I know that it is rarely a good month for anyone, what with the blahs; the cold, the interminable gray, the confinement to the indoors with those idiots you work with or live with moaning endlessly on about the cold and the gray and how everyone they know has, for some inexplicable reason, turned into an idiot ... But this February was particularly bad, and not for these reasons. Not just for these reasons, anyway.

So what happened? did I hear you ask? And keep it short for once! I think I heard you add.

Well, it's a long story and a rather involved one, but I will keep it short as it isn't actually mine to tell ... Oh, sorry, did you think I'd been talking about myself? God, no! My February was fine! What I can remember of it anyway. No, I was talking about Kevin Grace's February. Brutal thing that.